Saturday, February 05, 2005

Intruder Alert: Artificial Life Found Leeching BrainFarm Data!

Just before dusk this evening I was doing the rounds and heard some strange noises emanating from one of the SynapseBridges, built over the ThoughtStream. The bridge connects two crucial NeuralFields, so security should be pretty tight. I went to investigate, and found two little A.I. creatures chewing into the neurons at the base of the bridge and swallowing up valuable data. I called backup and they were duly captured for observational study.

Using a Free Toolkit for A.I. programmers, our scientists could inspect the animals (now known as Zooks) in an entirely secure virtual world, and could even create more of the little buggers. Their scientific report begins:

"Insect-like in appearance, and with very fluid movement, the creatures were unusually coloured and did not like being prodded. They excelled at all the environmental adaptability tests our team could throw at them, and seem exceptionally spatially-aware for such small creatures. We noted they were also quite competitive. It must be in their programming."

As much as we love our new pets, we cannot afford for our SynapseBridges to be damaged in any way, or priceless bytes of information travelling in the ThoughtStream will be lost to us. The security issue has now been addressed, and investigation of how the creatures found their way to the BrainFarm is now underway. Currently, all we know of their origins is that they escaped from a BBC Online Server, and they were created in some Artificial Intelligence Laboratories in Cambridge, known as Gameware Development

We wish Gameware the best of luck with all of their future developments (the LivingPictures software is superb) but we ask that they keep their Zooks on a tighter leash.

Aerial Photograph of NeuralField Shows Sexual Repression in Family Film Shocker!!

For those that are interested in how BrainFarm actually grows its thoughts, well, the process will become clear to you over time, lets put it that way. For now though, here's a birds-eye-view of one of the NeuralFields:

The fields look like a cross between a hedge-maze, a huge organic brain, and a massive live coral. Depending on the subject material each NeuralField has been programmed with, the hue of the field changes.

The field above is processing some images from Disney films, and is finding some highly-charged scenes of sexual repression and sexual imagery, hence the red tint.

Just a little insight into the BrainFarm's inner workings for you...

Announcement: NetCow of the Week!

This fine specimen is the highly evolved NetCow02, who has the highest web-trawler results for this week. He wins a copy of 'City of Heroes' for the PC. Well done, NetCow02!

Friday, February 04, 2005

Networked Farm Animal Finds Profound Quote!

Here at the BrainFarm we are all for innovation, and are constantly sharpening the cutting edge of technology. We are the exclusive owners of the world's only NetCows, and we have a whole herd. Pioneered by us, NetCows are just like normal cows, but much smarter.

They were bred to have highly evolved minds, and their central nervous system can be wirelessly connected to the Internet. As long as they are happy bovines, the bandwidth is kept high. In fact, their networked brains are hosting this website right now! Our herd just got back from exhibiting at the Cow Parade, and they're just settling into things again.

By day they simply count the flow of traffic to our website (you can see them at the bottom of this page), but by night their electronic minds go online, and trawl the Web for cool stuff. This morning NetCow02 found a quote relevant to the work we are doing in the 'Media and Communication' NeuralField, and sent me an email:

"Television: A medium. So called because it is neither rare nor well done"
Ernie Kovacs 1919 - 1962, an American comedian.

So then, it seems our investment in the NetCow breeding programme is finally paying off (we were getting worried). Expect more quotes, pictures, links, and other fun stuff from the web-trawling NetCows in the coming weeks. In the meantime though, why not post some of the quotes that you have found on the subject of media in the comments box, or answer this week's query from the QuestionBarn?

Thursday, February 03, 2005

Academic Institution Commissions a NeuralField!

Big things happened today at the BrainFarm. Just a day after our website went up, we recieved contact from Oxford Brookes University, with a very special request.

They are looking for the space to grow some thoughts for one of their modules called "
Media and Communication". The seeds were planted today, and they are already taking root in their very own NeuralField.

The shoots are a slightly green in colour, so with our expert knowledge of mental horticulture, we predict the fully grown thoughts and reflections will be displayed like this. We just hope our newest client, a mister
CyberChimp, will be happy with the eventual crop.

Wednesday, February 02, 2005

Breaking News: First Signs of Life at the BrainFarm

The BrainFarm is now online.

That means the Web has once again expanded into pastures new, and its tendrils have finally found their way here to the Farm. Good news too, because we think we have lots to offer its info-hungry byte-surfers.

A fresh crop of tasty and organically grown thoughts are currently growing in the Farm's NeuralFields, and, once ready to be harvested, we'll put them up on our site for your processing pleasure.

We expect that a new crop of thoughts will be fully grown in the next few days, which we think you'll find delicious. But for now, think about what you'd grow in a BrainFarm of your own.

Right, must dash, I need to round up the grazing NetCows before it gets dark.